I'm a day late, but

Happy Birthday to ME!!!

Can't believe I've finally hit the big 3 - 0.

It's not much different from 29.

Thank goodness I have ten more years before I hit another milestone.  It will take me almost that long to recover from all the introspection that comes with a decade birthday.

Say a little prayer for

This is a pretty pathetic confession, but it's probably true for a lot of people.

I've never really given much thought to the boys, girls, women and men that fight for our country.

I have an uncle and two grandfathers that went to war. My dad, my brother, my husband have never had to go. Until earlier this year I was never close to someone while they went off to war. I wrote letters around the holidays when the radio djs prompted, but I never really thought about the person that would be on the receiving end.

My friend and neighbor Starla has a nephew, Mason that came to live with her a few years ago. Mason was 18 when I met him and such a sweet but misguided and irresponsible boy. We (by we I mean my friends in the 'hood) all liked Mason, but he did dumb things now and again that would get him in trouble.

Mason worked for his uncle Jimmy to get a paycheck, but he didn't love the work and there wasn't much that tied him down other than a car payment. Out of the blue (at least to me) Mason announced he had joined the Army in 2008. He wanted to be a Ranger. A week before Braylen was born he went off to boot camp. His training went well, he excelled. He learned to throw grenades, jump from helicopters and plenty of other skills that will be useful to him now.

We didn't see Mason much after he left for boot camp, but we all wrote letters. I should have written more. In February Mason left for Afghanistan. He wouldn't talk about what he would be doing because he didn't want to scare his cousins. His basic job description - when I pressed - was breaking down doors.

I have cried for Mason and his family several times since he left. It's tough to believe that he is there and remember what he is doing. I'm scared for him and his family. The only thing that protects him is God and a gun. I pray for Mason often and it's usually that God agrees with me that Mason should come home healthy and unscathed by the horrors he is seeing and doing while he is so far from us.

I learned today that he has his second concussion since he got there - wherever there is. His vehicle drove over a roadside bomb and he was knocked around pretty good. I think that's where the concussion came from but the details are sketchy. Other than a never ending headache he is doing ok as far as I know. Ok can mean many different things.

If you are reading this please pray for all the soldiers that are so far from home. Mason doesn't have a wife or kids to worry about, but he has a Mom, Aunt, Grandma and lots of friends waiting for his return.

We pray often that his mind and body will come home without too many scars.

Wow, it's loud in my house

Every day I get home around 3:30. Ryan has to be picked up from pre-k by 4pm. This leaves me almost 30 minutes of absolute peace and quiet at home. It's the only part of my day (aside from the 2 hours I spend in the car) that I can think without someone else interupting me.

This may not sound like much to be excited over, but I have a loud husband and loud kids. They don't mean to be loud it's just that their vocal cords are set at a louder volume then the rest of the world.

Sometimes I feel guilty about coming home to do whatever I want.

Most days there is no guilt. Simply because its the only time I can be alone and everyone deserves some time alone. I can go to the bathroom without someone following me. I can attempt to nap without little people climbing on me. I can read a book and not tune out the voices of my family.

It's delightful. It's indulgent. It's heaven.

I'm so lucky for my 30 minutes a day.

Ear Infection Fun

There are VERY few things that get me leaping out of bed in the morning. In fact, I'm pretty difficult to wake unless one of my babes are screaming. Well, this morning I leaped out of bed for a new reason. I heard Jason fall over in the shower. Oh My Gosh, it was scary.

Definitely got my heart rate up early!

Turns out he fell over because he was suddenly dizzy. And he stayed dizzy for almost an hour. After getting the kids to school I went to the doctor with him.

I was thinking ear infection (even though he had no pain in his ear) and I was right. Thank Goodness that's all that was wrong. They even did an EKG just to be sure. So now he is loaded up with meds and an exercise that should help him get past all the dizziness and infection.

That'll be $75 in copays and medicine. So glad we don't get sick too often at my house. I'd go broke quick!

Happy Friday Y'all!

Morbid? Maybe....

Ok, so I'm 29, for 12 more days at least, and I think about death pretty frequently. Not really about death itself, but how I will go, if I will outlive Jason for years, when my loved ones will die. I know it's pretty strange, but I can't help myself. I'm very curious about it all.

So since I think about these things often I know exactly what I want when I kick the bucket. I want to be cremated and scattered at the beach. Which beach is the only detail still undecided.... Maybe I will leave that to my loved ones to figure out??? Anyway, I want there to be a big party on the beach complete with a picnic of my favorite foods and drinks, lots of Jimmy Buffett music and a bonfire.

After the big celebration I want a park to be built some place near my kids and grandkids. In the park there should be a bench and on that bench a little plaque like this one....

And here is the bench itself nestled in the sand. On second thoughts, maybe I want my bench left at the beach too. My family can think of me every time they visit the beach which should be at least once a summer.

Yeah, it's probably pretty strange, but I think about it anyway.

I miss this place...

It doesn't even have to be this particular beach, but almost any beach would be lovely today. As long as its warm and I am there. It would be nice if it were quiet like this one too, not over run with kids and families.

Last time I was at the beach I didn't get to enjoy it much because Jason was busy with this...

He's the third from the right. Handsome isn't he? He spent most of his day setting up for the wedding.


Next time we're there we will have more time to spend together. Probably with the kids building sand sculptures.

Happy Friday!

What's your favorite time of day???

Braylen's is definitely his bath time. No matter how crummy he felt today with his two new molars coming in bath time has temporary made him feel good. He is 'swimming' around in the tub with a cup and an empty soap bottle laughing and carrying on. It's nice to see (and hear) him feeling so great since he was a pill this weekend. Those teeth make him super grumpy.

His bath time delight has me thinking about my favorite time of day. I actually have two favorites.

The first is shortly after I get home in the afternoon. It's around 4 when I get home and settled from my day at work. As soon as I have changed clothes, R and B and I find something fun to get into. Sometimes we race around the house in laundry baskets - (I push B, Ry can propel herself by pushing off the floor). Today we sat outside with a new library book and a bubble-gun from the Easter Bunny. That's a great part of my day.

The second favorite is after the kids are in bed and Jason and I get our first real moments alone together. It's tough to talk about anything while the kiddos are constantly requiring attention. I've thought about changing our dinner schedule so that Jas and I can have dinner alone together, but when you wake up at 5am every day you don't want to eat dinner at 8pm. We'd eat dinner and go almost immediately to bed.

So what's your favorite time of day? Is your decision based on what your are doing or who you are with?

It's Friday and I'm....

bored.  So you can see what I have done today....  I updated the look of my blog.  I chose the recycle symbol since Earth day is this month.  Usually right near my birthday.

I would like my kids to appreciate the Earth.  We know loads of people that don't bother to recycle or reduce their pollution of the world.  It makes me sad for future generations.

Maybe we'll plant something on Earth day.

19 days, 2 hours until

I turn 30. It's a big birthday. Probably because by 30 most people hope to be established in whatever lifestyle they have worked for. I have a friend that wanted to be published by 30 and my goal was to be an established wife and mother. I made that goal, but there are others that were secondary that weren't accomplished.

I considered making a list of things I wanted to do before I turned 30, but I have discarded that idea. A few months really isn't enough time to accomplish the items that would have been on that list. Maybe by 40 I can tick those off the score sheet....

Instead of marking things off before I turn 30, I am making a list of things I want to do the year I'm 30. I want to remember to breathe more often and stress over the small things less. I want to enjoy the moment as it is happening around me instead of remembering what I can after the moment has passed. I want to be more comfortable in my own skin - to accept the things I cannot change about myself, and learn to celebrate the things I like about myself. I want to find some personal balance between my home-life and my work-life.

This is going to be a great year!

I know I haven't posted in a while. Here's a favorite thing as I work up to a bigger post....

There is a song by Steven Curtis Chapman that says:
I can see the fingerprints of God
When I look at you
I can see the fingerprints of God
And I know its true
You're a masterpiece
That all creation quietly applauds
And you're covered with the fingerprints of God

I like it. Reminds me of my kids....